When I first learned to waterski, my Uncle Doug stood behind me and gave me a strong push, knocking me off balance and effectively determining which foot I favor in front for balance. In years since, I have sometimes tried to ski with the wrong foot forward and can never find my balance to get up. The last couple of weeks I have felt over and over like I'm getting pushed off balance and am being tested to see if I put my best foot forward, or if I fall.
One of the experiences that has pushed me off balance is the death of a 7 year old little boy in our area. Saturday was his funeral. The spirit was strong and the doctrine presented by the Methodist pastor was full of hope. Nevertheless, my overwhelming feeling was, "that's it? Only seven years and Hayden has fulfilled the measure of his creation?" All he did was have fun, try new things, and figure out which things were naughty, nice, or naughty, but worth the consequences. He learned to love and be loved. He learned to make friends. If that was all he needed to do, then I am overthinking this mortal experience. All the duties and jobs and responsibilities I have determined to be part of a successful life seem a little superfulous right now.
The experience has also emphasized the blessing of the atonement in helping me identify how to "mourn with those that mourn and succor those who stand in need." I have no desire to ever experience the emotions Jill is having. I can't imagine anything more painful. On the other hand, I want desperately to help her. Since the Savior knows exactly how she feels, has in fact felt those feelings, I can rely on him to teach me how to help.
Wish I had a funny anecdote to share, but life seems a little serious right now.
1 comment:
success- have fun, try new things, love and make friends, behave or be responsable..
Thanks for this simple thought. Just be there to 'listen' to Jill while she remembers. Let her touch bottom so she can spring up again. Walk with her. She will find her own hope again.
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