November blows in

We had an exciting weather event last week. A terrible wind storm hit Washington and blew us to bits. Spokane was hardest hit and a lot of people were out of power for over a week and schools were closed for days. We had a giant branch crack over the peak of the roof and shake everyone in the attic. We lost shingles off the garage and power for a day. The kids built a big bonfire and we had pancakes and sausage on the grill for breakfast. We did learn an important lesson about keeping cars and propane tanks full! The storm did not stop 33 Relief Society women meeting at the church for taco salads though. We are so zealous sometimes.

Cooper was a star in the junior play this weekend. He did a good job remembering so many lines and it was fun to see the kids enjoying each other and being normal high school kids.

Basketball is in full swing. Three kids are playing. Last week Max had to miss two games because of poor grades. It was a very painful lesson, but it was great to have a kid who reacts to this consequence correctly.

I enjoyed several book groups this month, especially hearing the author of "All the Light we Cannot See." Book groups are one of the greatest joys of life.

We had a special experience at the temple with 7 new members of our ward to do baptisms. Tony performed the baptisms. We talked about the symbolism of the temple in relation to the Abrahamic Covenant, including Moroni calling the tribes, the 12 oxen supporting the font and the symbolism of adoption through baptism and taking on us Christ's name. Studying the Old Testament is helping me see clearly these symbols. So Amazing!



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Broken nose, broken heart

On Friday I went to work to clean out the kitchen at the school where my student Kaleb and I work. I invited Kaleb to come with me. After a few minutes I heard Kaleb hitting his head on the window--not a good sign. Something was really wrong, but I didn't know what. Kaleb was really upset and In frustration Kaleb head butted me in the nose. I heard a crunch and blood started pouring everywhere. This further upset Kaleb and he began biting and hitting himself terribly. I called for back-up and we eventually got him back to the classroom, where his Dad came to get him. My nose really hurt, but my heart hurt more. I did not feel one bit of anger toward Kaleb, no blame and no fear. This experience did not affect my desire to see Kaleb for therapy on Tuesday, or at church on Sunday. I felt so much love for him and such compassion for his broken brain.

Wilson has also hurt me. Sadly, I continue to hold resentment and anger tightly. I struggle to feel love. Sometimes, I don't want to see him. I have a ton of guilt about these feelings, but they are nevertheless there.

I'm grateful for my broken nose this weekend because it showed me that I have the capacity. If I can have the ability to not take Kaleb's actions personally, I have the capacity to do the same with Wilson. I know I will need the Savior's help and the enabling power of the atonement, but I have increased hope.


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Eagle Running Club

Running Club this year was a racing success!  Our weather every day was perfect, including the day of the fun run.  We had over 50 kids participate and a ton of parental support.  All participants got lanyards and we cooked over 100 miles all together.  The fun run was my favorite part

family fall festival

One of my favorite family traditions is the family fall festival.  We make scones and cider at Cam and Jill's.  Jeff and Stacey bring potatoes from Moses Lake and the cousins frolic.  This year we had an official Ripprope meeting.  I love my family.  I love that we get along and are tolerant of each other.  I love that we have strengths and weaknesses and are united in the gospel.  I love my great parents that taught us these things and the general lack of dysfunction in our family.  I love our weirdness and our obsession with bottoms.  And I love that I'm the boss.

Happy Halloween

I love Saturday Halloweens. We had a relaxed and peaceful day: a good run, homemade granola, trimming trees, carving pumpkins and healthy Halloween party with friends. Rain poured on the trick or treaters last night so the haul wasn't as ridiculous as usual. Max was happy and anxiety free this year, a stark contrast from last year. When plans changed last minute he was able to roll with it and have fun anyway--gives me great hope. Eliza went as bat girl and Marcos was a train engineer.

We still don't hear much from Wilson. Several people have attempted to make contact with him, but with no success. I was able to complete his official medical withdrawal from school and petition for tuition reimbursement. It would be a tremendous financial blessing, a tithing blessing.

During my last visit, I recognized the palpable absence of fear in the temple. When I'm there, I don't know why I worry about Wilson. I feel confident that the grace of the Savior's atonement and the sealing power will ensure his return to us and Heavenly Father. But I don't know how to maintain that assurance when my feet step out of the temple. Lately it seems that mortality is singularly the experience of managing fear.

There is a lot of space in my life right now, empty shelves and wide margins. The emotional and physical requirements to raise Wilson are gone. It is taking some deliberation to reassign that energy to the right things. I feel anxious to be directed by the spirit and not waste time or talents.

Cooper is busy. He is the lead in the junior play, a star tuba and piano player in the band and the dunk master of the Eagles basketball team. Coop is a faithful seminary attender, which I appreciate. He is a highly social boy and fills his weekends with lots of activities with friends. Lately he is making more deposits than withdrawals in the trust bank and is enjoying more freedoms. We pray often that he isn't just dancing the steps, but is hearing the music.

Eliza finished her basketball season. She is a great team player. Grandma and Grandpa came for her last game and to see her highlighted her 8th grade year.  Max cheered her on with the football team--in a dress!  Eliza also got her braces off!  Sometimes her confidence is shaky and I hope we can find something that will help her realize how great she is.

Marcos is struggling in school, but I'm not worried. I've seen this pattern before and I want to keep a good balance for him. He is enjoying reading right now and math facts are getting easier.

Max loves playing basketball! He had a terrible scare when the State athletic committee announced that 6th graders wouldn't be allowed to play. He came home in tears. I was pleased that he turned to the Lord in prayer and when we got a call later that night that the decision and been reversed, we were able to give all the credit to Heavenly Father. Max had a good experience working hard at a geography test and succeeding. Max seems to be gaining in confidence and ability to focus.

Tony has spent most Saturday's at new convert baptisms. It has been amazing to watch him shepherd new members and nourish them in the good work of Christ.

I love the Old Testament. This year, more than the last OT seminary year, I am seeing constant temple references pointing to the Savior. Last week we studied the story of of Isaac and Rebekah. I recognized a clear pattern. True messengers are sent to assess the worthiness by looking for a sign. They recognize the sign and find a woman keeping the law of chastity and willing to obey and sacrifice (as evidenced by her work with the camels). They invite her into a covenant relationship with the bridegroom (The Savior). They promise all the blessings of the father through this covenant relationship. The messenger returns and Rebekah veils her face in symbolic gesture of this covenant.
Beautiful. Simple. Comforting.



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