Evan the miracle

Eliza and I escaped the heat of the desert and headed north this weekend.  Eliza hung out with her friend Eden Workman and I was with Amy and Callie.  The visit fueled my soul.  I was fed by sweet hugs from Henry, amazing pink cookies, late nights with Amy and shopping!  A special highlight was attending Evan's farewell.  Every missionary is a miracle and I'm so happy to have seen this one up close and personal.  Evan did a great job of sharing his conversion story in a vulnerable and open way.  It was really nice to see my Mom and Dad enjoy that moment.  Always bittersweet, but Im learning to enjoy the bitter and the sweet simultaneously.  Pain and peace coexist

The New House

Last night I unpacked the last box!  We are officially in the new house.  It feels a lot like a poorly furnished VRBO.  Most of the time, I don't regret bringing not all of our furniture, because it's just stuff and was a burden anyway.  Sometimes however, I feel so lonely and out of sorts I wish had the familiar things I loved to bring me comfort.  I miss my St John kitchen the most.  It feels like there is no heart in this home. 

Work is a true solace.  And i like swimming at the rec center.  I've met a few people at church, but have not had the opportunity to form connections yet.  I just need to be patient. 

Wilson is doing really poorly.  He made up a story that he has been working at Taco Time and perpetuated it until Dad finally went and the restaurant said they had never heard of him.  Still so hard to know what our role is and how best to help him.   I just keep going to the temple and turning it over to the Savior. 

Eliza is working a lot at the rec center, working out with her personal trainer and is done with school by 11:30 every day.  She is excited to go back to St John this weekend to stay with Hannah and see  her friends. She is gaining independence, and being forced to do all many of uncomfortable things.

Max's part time job is friends.  He is rarely home and when he is has little emotional reserve for anyone in his family.  I'm really hoping he finds his groove soon.  I had a good talk with one of his teachers the other day.  He has an F in her class and spent the first month doing nothing.  He was overwhelmed and shut down.  She finally spoke with him firmly enough to get his attention and Max started catching up.  She called me and said she has seen a marked change, that he isn't hanging around the students who are doing nothing, that he is respectful and that he is really good at this.  Max continues to struggle greatly at church.  He plays video games on his phone during the sacrament and yells obscenities loud enough for all our new neighbors to hear.   It's really hard for all of us at church, but Max seems to feel it the most.

Tony spent the week training on the computers and hating not seeing patients.  This is humbling for him.   He likes the people he works with however and is looking forward to making connections with the vets.

Marcos is the most socially successful of all of us.  He is doing ok in school, holding his own.  He continues to have difficulty with his family interactions, being disrespectful to his parents, silly when it is time to be serious and insatiable in his need for attention.  We are going to address it in counseling. 

We are in a disruptive process here.  It is good for us.  It's hard, but hard isn't bad, its just hard.